Alone for fifteen years then the unexpected..

The years flew by as I concentrated on providing a stable home environment for my sons. They got involved in Christian Surfers from intermediate age. The social support with good role models gave them good clean fun through their teen years and kept them out of trouble. God also provided good male role models in the fathers of the fellowship that also happened to introduce my sons to surfing. I also purposefully spent time mixing with other families and refused to be pushed into the 'solo-parent / singles' box that society tries to organise. Through mixing with families, I ended up taking my sons with another family on week long hikes through our beautiful NZ National Parks. It was a wonderful experience amongst God's creation.

I continued my job as an Intensive Care/Coronary Care nurse and loved it. After twelve years I found people coming to me for counselling, seeing me as a survivor solo parent and liked the way my sons turned out. It didn't take me long to realise the other parties' issues were very different from my experience. I had been married for 10 years prior to becoming solo. I decided I needed more training and looked at courses available. Unfortunately they were all out of town, so I decided not to upset my sons' stability and put it aside.

I became involved in International Hospital Christian Fellowship while looking for ways to be more equipped to meet the spitritual needs of some of my patients. This included going on a course in 1987 to Manilla, which God opended the doors miraculously for me to do. After that I felt my calling was for NZ. I could see NZ was in danger of heading down the same path, if not careful, and intercession for our Nation became part of my walk with Jesus. I also became involved intraining the Hospital Chaplaincy team helpers and others that visited the sick and dying. I was very involved in my Church also. Life was fulfilling and I was contented.

One day when vacuming the floor at home, I was thinking my youngest son was leaving home soon and was wondering what I would do. The Lord spoke clearly to me saying "what about that counselling course you wanted to do?".  I thought prayerfully about it and decided to go to the church prayer meeting and ask for prayer for guidance regarding my future. My eldest son was also praying about going on a Christian Surfer's Mission and I suggested we both go to the meeting and ask for prayer. The meetings were exciting because God's Holy Spirit met with us and the gifts of the Spirit were flowing, as well as many prayers being answered.

We went and my son was prayed for first. The elder who prayed for my son didn't know him. So when he prophesied over him I recognised that the words showed knowledge only God knew about my son, who was very astute in God. This encouraged my faith and  I was prayed over by the man and another elder. The man spoke of all the things that were on my heart regarding the future, which only God knew, and then continued to prophesy that God knew all these things and had made provision for my future. As the man spoke, he pointed to me, and I felt a warm power hit me, flowing over me with a 'knowing' that it meant marriage. I immediately reacted within myself, thinking "he (the man) is saying marriage! Doesn't he know God showed me that I was to be on my own for a long time? How dare he. I must put him straight!" I felt angry at the thought of my life being interfered with. (I must note here that the man didn't actually speak about marriage, it was the Holy Spirit impressing the words on me).

I didn't get the opportunity to talk to the man until after church a fortnight later. I met him and his wife outside the church and was about to say I needed to speak with him. But the man saw me and immediately said "I 've been wanting to speak with you. I had a dream or vision one night during the week and the Lord told me to tell you that this is from God. In the dream or vision I saw you were getting married". I was stopped in my tracks an said, " but that is what I wanted to speak to you about. God showed me a long time ago that I was to stay on my own". "Don't worry about it" the man said, "put it on the back shelf, forget about it and if it is from God, it will happen. Time will tell".

I went home astounded  because I knew God had shown me when the man had prayed, it had been confirmed by the man and his dream. It had got my attention. I thought about it and thought "I don't want to get married! I'm happy with my life as it is now and feel fulfilled. I don't need a husband for the sake of having one. Then I thought  about God's Will and prayed that "if it is your will Lord, then I will submit, if it is part of your purpose for my life. But he had better be a man with a heart that loves you like King David did." Then I forgot about it and prepared to go off and do a Counselling Diploma, taking two years unpaid leave from the hospital to do it.